Happiness in solitude

A little over a week ago, I was staying with my father in the not-so-exciting town of Springville, NY, located about 30 minutes from Buffalo. The town was quaint in its own way comprised of one Main Street, about four restaurants and a Wal-Mart. There are a little over 4,000 uninteresting people living there that have all known each other since birth, and whose conversations consist of their kids and the school system, tractors and their performance, construction and how it affects traffic, the road that is the best route to take to Buffalo (without aforementioned traffic and construction) and the new quarterback/running back/tight end (or whatever) for the Buffalo Bills. Not quite my cup of tea. Needless to say, I was antsy to explore a more stimulating environment on my week-long vacation.

Luckily, Springville is about two hours away from Toronto, a city (and country) I have never visited but has topped my list of "Cities I need to get my ass to see right away." And coincidentally, there happened to be a few DJs from Paris that were playing there who had also been on the top of my list of "DJs I need to experience right away, especially if they are from Europe." But since my dad could not accompany me to Toronto, I was faced with the option of going solo to Tha Deuce City or possibly dying of boredom in a small town. I opted for the former.

Toronto was everything I hoped it would be and more. The Parisian DJs did not disappoint and I had an incredible time on my own doing whatever my heart desired -- considering it was agreeable with my wallet, of course. It made me feel free and liberated to discover a new city by myself and I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Upon my return to Springville (and even Orlando), I was surprised by the number of people who couldn't believe I had gone alone. I kept hearing things like "I could never do that" and "Wow, weren't you lonely?" and "What did you do all by yourself?"

Sure, there were times when I was reminded of my friends and there were certain things that I wish they could have experienced with me, but for the most part I was completely content being alone. I found it motivating and enlivening and wonderful.

Lately I have been pondering being alone and the importance of being comfortable with being alone. The way I feel is best illustrated by the quotes below:

"Language... has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone." -- Paul Tillich

"Solitude is strength; to depend on the presence of the crowd is weakness. The man who needs a mob to nerve him is much more alone than he imagines." -- Paul Brunton

"Being solitary is being alone well: being alone luxuriously immersed in doings of your own choice, aware of the fullness of your won presence rather than of the absence of others. Because solitude is an achievement." -- Alice Koller

We were born alone and we will die alone. So be your own favorite person and find happiness in your solitude. It feels pretty damn awesome.

xoxoxoxo
Becky